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Subject: SYSADMIN Manpage (fwd)

sysadmin(8)            2 October 1995           Version 0.1.2 Reference Manual

sysadmin - user interface to system management protocol. 

sysadmin [-abBcCdefpqrstw] lusername

sysadmin takes care of everything, is generally harrangued, must be
supplied with coffee(5), chocolate(5), and alcohol(5) in order to function
properly, cannot be exposed to direct sunlight and must not have a

Contraction of "systems" and "administrator". Responsible for everything
imaginable onsite that may or may not have to do with the
systems/services in question.

Sysadmin was not intended as a user-interface routine; other programs
should provide their own user-friendly front-ends. Traditionally, sysadmin
is used by everyone who can track him/her down regardless of

When called with no command line options, sysadmin reads its standard
input to an EOF, or to a line which sysadmin wishes to parse, and then
proceeds to ignore it entirely, reads news and/or play x-games all day

start sysadmin in "argument" mode. useful for appropriations and budget
meetings. starts "antogonize" mode if sysadmin is started with
lusername command line argument.

-bofh - Enter "Bastard Operator From Hell" mode.
This option when invoked, causes sysadmin to use tools stored in
/usr/lib/bofh directory to parse stdin and fork user tasks appropriately.

Causes sysadmin to function normally while augmenting the standard
input with beer(5), scotch(5), and whiskey(5). Can also be used in
conjunction with the -t switch, dependant on which version of sysadmin
you are running.

Creates the configuration and freezes the file.

causes sysadmin to become caffiene deprived, resulting in massive
system slowdowns.

Specify an alternate configuration file ( is default).

Sets the degugging value to X.

causes sysadmin to fork an Expound_Clue process to background piped
to /dev/luser.

set sysadmin to pipe all flames to given device.

this flag tells sysadmin whether or not it will attach to /dev/ATTx after
RING input.

quit - causes sysadmin to reject input from clueless management.

set sysadmin "ringer" option. this determines whether RING inputs from
/dev/ATTx will be passed for further processing.

spawn sysadmin in "sleep" mode.

Causes sysadmin to smoke tobacco, which can result in significant
performance gains, provided you are running the correct version of

cause sysadmin to parse work input and process. never used. included
to maintain backwards compatibility.

The -t option should not be attempted with a version of sysadmin that is
not capable of parsing tobacco input. Though the functionality of this
command may seem similar in nature to the -b option, it is not, and
should be kept seperate. The same applied for the -cd option, which
when combined with the -b option, could render your sysadmin totally
inaccessible for long periods of time.

Calling sysadmin with a command line lusername automatically adds
lusername to the .kill file.


/etc/ - sysadmin configuration
~root/coffee.db - hashed database of coffee recipes
~root/.crontab - scheduling file -t/-b/-bofh/-w options
~root/.kill - luser reject database

None. What you see are undocumented features and/or hallucinations.

Eric Pederson [eric at]
All the fine folks of a.s.r.
10/02/95 - Features added by: Ford Prefect [fprefect at].
10/02/95 - Features added by: Exile In Paradise [exile at]

Abby Franquemont-Guillory [abbyfg at]
HTML version by: XIII Generation/Helix NetWorks.
Comments and suggestions are welcome.
Any questions will be immediately parsed using the -bofh option.
Flames will be sent to /dev/null.

Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.

Copyright (C) 2009 Brandon Long. All Rights Reserved. / Terms of Service

The "I work for a big public company" disclaimer:
The views expressed on these pages are mine alone and not those of my employer.
I am not now, nor have I ever been employed to speak for anyone.
Well, except my own company, but that's gone now.